Greg Koukl and Amy Hall explain that prayer is not made more effective by length or eloquence but by sincerity and clarity before God.
Transcript
Amy: Let’s go on to a question from Ellie: “What difference, if any, is there between a short and to-the-point prayer and a wordy, eloquent prayer, especially if they both truly come from the heart?”
Greg: Well, this gets to what I call the calculus of prayer, which I am largely ignorant on. I read a book recently by Kevin DeYoung, who’s worth reading on everything he writes, and he always writes short books, which is really good. And he did a piece on prayer, and his point there is that a short prayer, when you express your needs before God adequately—in other words, clearly and persuasively is the way I’ve characterized it (I got that from J. P. Moreland, by the way). So, we speak clearly, and we speak persuasively. We’re trying to persuade God to do something for a certain reason. He gets that from the prayers in the New Testament and the Old Testament—prayers in the Bible. This is the way people prayed. And so, if we do that, then we can move on.
And I have been hamstrung by this same concern. Well, maybe I should say the same thing in a bunch of different ways, and it will make it more potent. Then God will listen. you know? But I think Kevin has a point. And if you look at the prayer that Jesus taught his disciples to pray, now, it prays in categories. I get that. And we’re not to pray that prayer just like that, which a lot of people do, and some methodically and multiple times over, which Jesus says don’t do it that way. He says “pray like this.” He didn’t say “pray this.” But it does seem like there’s an appeal to be straightforward about these particular things. You know? “Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us, and deliver us from the evil.” So, these are, kind of, categories, but notice they’re not complicated. They’re not flowery. They’re just straight up. And I think that’s fine.
There are times when our hearts, I think, are much more invested in the prayer and distressed, maybe, and so we are going to be praying more about that. But the difference is this. I think sometimes we think, if I say the prayer this way a bunch of different times, you know, if I just keep going back over it, that I’m increasing the merit of the prayer, and God will listen. To me, that’s different than what I was just referring to, which is when we are emotionally involved in the issue. And I’m thinking, just in my drive to the studio today, there were so many things I was pouring out my heart to God about that were so deep and personal to me that I just kept talking about them. And at some point, I was asking for him to act. But a whole part of that conversation—or, I should say, that prayer with God on that issue—was just me emoting, me having a cathartic experience, me pouring out my heart before God, and not so much that if I just do this more this way, then he’ll really wake up and listen.
So, I think, theologically, we don’t have to keep going on and on and on and on about it. Even Jesus says, “Your father knows what you need even before you ask.” Okay? Not that it’s not important for us to ask, because he responds to the request, even though he knows what we need. But if you want to go into more detail, let the detail reflect the pathos of your heart in the midst of your prayer and not the sense that if I just keep knocking this around in different ways, then it’ll be more persuasive to God.
By the way, Ellie, I completely identify with this because I always struggle with this. I have for years and years and years. Then I read something like Kevin DeYoung’s book, which I’m not sure of the title. Do you know the title?
Amy: Are you talking about the daily doctrine one, or are you talking about a different one?
Greg: No, no, that’s a big one. This one’s a small one. Well, yeah. That’s his only big one—the daily doctrine one. That’s a devotional-type thing. This is the one about the Lord’s Prayer, I think. That’s the topic of it. It’s D-E-Y-O-U-N-G. Kevin—K-E-V-I-N—DeYoung. So, just go to Amazon, and you’ll see a lot of books that he has. You’ll find the one on prayer if you’re interested in that. Amy will probably put it in the show notes, too. But it’s an encouragement. I still have it sitting next to my chair where I have my morning time, with a pile of other books there too. But I had to pull it out and reread some of that just to remind myself that I don’t have to pound away in that way at the door.
Now, I repeat my prayers. I keep going over and over and over again. That is, the next day, I might be praying the same thing. It’s like. ask, seek, knock—boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. You know? And if I haven’t woken up the innkeeper yet, I’m going to keep pounding on the door, you know, kind of thing. But I don’t think it’s necessary to get God’s attention and to persuade him that you go into this—you say the same thing a bunch of different ways, and maybe you’ll hit the right phraseology that will unlock the answer to the prayer. I don’t think—it doesn’t work that way.
Amy: I think that’s a great distinction, Greg. The problem is not—because the question here is “a short and to the point” or “wordy and eloquent”—the problem is not a lack of eloquence or the need to say things the right way. That’s just such a great—in fact, Jesus even says, you know, don’t be like the pagans who think that they’ll be heard because of their many words. So, if that’s what you’re doing—you’re trying to craft your prayer in a way that will in some way manipulate God or have more merit with God—then that’s not useful. But it is completely fine to empty your heart out before God. And of course, this all depends on your personality. And we all have friends who love to tell us every detail about everything and have a lot of words, and some who are very brief about what they’re explaining. So, some of that just has to do with personality. It’s fine to say things in a more brief way. And when you have more to say to God, just say more. But don’t worry about the way you’re saying it as being a necessary part of the prayer.
Greg: Right. Remember the shortest prayer in the Bible. Peter, trying to walk on water semi-successfully, says, “Lord, save me.” Three words in English. And Jesus responded, “Of course.”